In Response...

In response to Dans post tagging me in on Birth, School, Work, Death in one scentence each, I give you:

Birth: I can't really remember this, but I am sure it involved flashes of lighting and angels descending from heaven.

School: A constant struggle to get more letters after my name than my siblings and I think I am in the lead!

Work: Half my time is spent chastising randoms for leaving their lights on, and the other half up to my armpits in rendered meat or flour or foul water or some other form of dirt or dust.

Death: Hopefully before I loose control of my bladder and / or mind.

I am not going to tag anyone here as I dont have as many web friends as big bro, but if anyone wants to take it up they are welcome! Dont feel sorry for me though as I am better looking, more intelligent, younger, and I have (slightly) more hair.

Fun Loving Criminals - Scooby Snacks

The earth tremor resulting from this one must have nearly caved in the river Holme embankment!

If You Aint Gottem, Then You Hit Rock Bottom

I got a phone call late last Saturday afternoon from my mate Alex - "Sam, I've got a spare ticket to see the Fun Lovin' Criminals at the Holmfirth Picturedrome". To which my first question was "What? the Holmfirth Picturedrome in Holmfirth?" and my second question was "Are you sure its the Fun Lovin' Criminals and not the Fun Hating Criminals or the Fun Lovin' Crumbinals or something?"

For those who dont know the Picturedrome, it is a small cinema in the sleepy 6,000 strong town of Holmfirth, well known for being a hangout for underage drinkers and scallies of all varieties. Apparently, the Picturedrome has been hosting all kinds of famous bands (or more accurately formerly famous bands) recently like the Bluetones, The Undertones, and Ocean Colour Scene. The tragedy is, tha plans appear to be underfoot to change the characterful cinema into a Weatherspoons (awful budget chain bar!), to which many locals are objecting (I have even found a large facebook group dedicated to trying to stop this from happening). I do, however find this plea for money from the local entrepeneur-owner rather amusing!

I am considering setting up an appeal of my own entitled "The If Anybody Wants to Give Money to Me, My Postal Address is... Appeal"

So, it looks like the FLC have fallen on hard times. I did a quick google search for their website, but was informed that the one that I found has expired. The gig though, was one of the best I have ever been to, Alex - 5 times FLC concertgoer and lifelong fan stated that it was the best FLC gig he had ever been to, and he even got to meet Huey backstage after the gig (having fought his way through a bevy of eager women)!

So lets hope the Picturedrome stays open!

And finally, for your entertainment - here is a picture of Alex licking Huey. I plan to post more pictures of Alex licking stuff in the future.

Oh How I Laughed

Lucy asked: "Am I the best looking one in the relationship?"

To which I replied: "No, but you're still really good looking"

Mr R.

I have this friend, lets call him Mr R. He used to work as a project engineer for a major international manufacturing company. We worked with him, we thought hey this guy is good, we then poached him off the client and gave him a nice big salary hike.

Mr R then went on a project at another one of our clients (a major retailer) and they took a liking to him and poached him also (bummer). I recently had a chat to him and he has now been poached by yet another major retailer. Way to double your salary in two years!

The energy consultancy game is certainly big business at the moment, with Climate Change being big news every Tom Dick and Harry is pretending to be an energy consultant, and everyone is scrabbling around to get anyone with experience that they can. My boss who sits in front of me (Mr I) and Mrs G who sits behind me claim to get a call from a head hunter at least once a month!!

I meanwhile get nothing. And christ could I do with a pay rise! It matters little at the moment as I am going to Oz, but the flattery certainly would be nice.

In addition, I am seriously wondering whether it is the right time to leave.... I've spent much of the last two years on boring jobs looking at light bulbs and heaters in shops, and just when I am due to leave we win masses of work (in Germany, Canada, and the UK) for huge steel works, foundries, and aerospace companies. Absolute sods law!!

Oh well. I guess climate change will still be here when I get back...

Beer Out of Plastic Bottles

Have you ever had something happen and thought in your head "Yes! I was right about that". I remember saying to Lucy a few months ago that in a few years time we would all be drinking wine and beer out of plastic bottles. She laughed at me. Turns out I might be right!

What the linked article neglects to mention is the massive amount of energy and raw material that goes into making glass in furnaces over 1600 degrees C (I've seen them), although a large amount of electrical energy goes into melting and blowing PET. I'd like to see someone work out the carbon saving (in fact I may do this next week).

And another bonus is that you can't smash somebody over the head with a plastic bottle on a Friday night!

I Like this Post

I really like this post. And from a guy from across the pond!

Is the world ending? Cos my feet are really wet!

Another British summer day, another series of flash floods, severe weather warnings and damp trousers. The ludicrously wet weather (and the lack of any kind of summer) we have been having recently would be extremely depressing and might bring on a case of the old SAD were it not for the fact that I will soon be abandoning this sinking country for much warmer climes!

I have to say that a very small (yet overly sadistic) part of me thinks it is good that London recieved the brunt of the torrential rain this time round. It seems to me that when it flooded in the North of England and uninteresting places like Doncaster and Hull (and even Sheffield) were ravaged by floodwater, it only appeared to be the local MPs and regional news teams that paid any real attention. I think that the significance of the fact that Sheffield had its wettest month EVER (not wettest June month) last month has gone largely unheeded.

As others have said, no scientist in their right mind would claim that this was clear evidence of Climate Change, but we are more likely to experience weather events like this in the future. Hopefully with the floods today hitting upmarket towns in London the politicians that actually make real decisions will sit up and take notice.

Seriously though, I have heard the term "its proper end of the world rain this" banded around by people as notoriously un-PC as Chris Moyles in the last month or so. It reminded me of my A level Geography classes on Malthusian Theory which suggests overpopulation leading to mass catastrophe from preventable diseases, political unrest, food production issues (general bad things that can be greatly influenced by things such as climate change and oil and water shortages). The predicted date of the start of catastrophe was before the year 2000, I reckon he forgot to carry the 8 and it was actually June 2007.

...on the up side I managed to get loads of dicount gear for my Australia trip from a flooded outdoors shop! Bonus.

A Dog Called John

Lucy seems to be getting pretty broody at the moment (well as always). Every time we pass a wedding shop its "I like that dress" or "at my wedding I want...." Children are also mentioned a little too often, not helped by our recent trip to visit the older (and younger Hughes' Dan, Kerry, Evan and Amy). Despite the fact that my neice and nephew are adorable, the words "aw I want one..." are enough to send shivers through my spine! Not just that, but she seems convinced that the ideal family is FOUR kids! FOUR!

My response (other than spending half an hour ranting about morality and overpopulation in the world today) has always been "I would really like to get a dog, maybe a golden retriever or something... something clever and trainable" to which Lucy replies "but dogs smell, and they need constant looking after", hmm I think to myself, is this really any different from your suggestion.

So my thought is this (and Lucy this is my proposal to you):

• If Lucy has a baby, I get to have a golden retriever.


• If Lucy has two babies, I get to have a boys room with cinema screen, bar and poker table.


• If lucy has three babies, I get to have a Lotus Elise


• If Lucy has four babies, I get to have an affair...

Also, I want to call my dog "John" just because I think it would be funny. For reference below is a photo of (potentially) John:Disclaimer: conversations mentioned in this blog may not actually be representative of "actual" conversations held and the author takes no responsibility for any offence taken.

Trekking in the High Tatras Part 2 (Slovakia)

Following on from my last High Tatras blog, I have got hold of some more pictures and will therefore continue my story...

After decending from the Polish peaks in order to cross the border, we staying in quite a nice little hostel / hotel and becan a massive ascent back up the Slovakian mountain. We climbed for four hours (up almost 1500m) in quite blistering heat which was by far the hardest of our days. Initially though woodland and eventually up the most evil of hillsides. A victory photo from the top is shown below. We then dropped down another couple of hundred meters on the other side to our next mountain hut (at the lakeside as in the picture), before commencing our last day.

On the last day we had quite a pleasant surprise. After making out way through some pretty flat woodland, we were expecting to come down via cable car into the valley. We discovered that at the cable car statiom, you could actually hire little go-carts to carry you all the way down the hill! This was too good an idea to resist!

After being todl by the operator "the company takes no responsibility for any injury" and shortly afterwards "dont overtake one another or you will die", both of which were less than re-assuring, we proceeded to race each other down the mountainside.

Photos of the High Tatras

www.flickr.com

Egg and Spoon Race Demons

On the same reminiscent theme as before, one of my clearest early memories is of one of my Primary School "sports days" at the age of around 5. Clearly designed to weed out the wheat from the chaff, school sports days were an opportunity for over enthusiastic parents to come into school and cheer over enthusiastically and drool manically over the thought of little Dave being best in class and maybe even, just maybe the next Linford Christie.

Events included the straight sprint (which in my school was a killer as the field was at a 30 degree angle), the three legged race (designed to also test shcool popularity), the egg and spoon race (a highly challenging mixture of speed and co-ordination), the highly competitive obstacle course, and the sack race.


I can clearly remember one of the most upsetting times of my childhood (second only to when my Mum lost out on that train toy at the Nabb school Jumble sale to another over-enthusiastic bargain hunter) as being when Anna Sykes took the last egg and spoon so that I was unable to compete in the race. Unconsolable, and tears streaming they had to get my older sister to eject me from the field of play!

This weekend my friend Fu arranged a sports day for us older folk for his birthday and I was able to overcome my egg and spoon race demons and take up the spoon once more! Although I lost...

Lucy and I did however win the three legged race (although I dragged her accross the line screaming by the ankle), so not all in vain.

See below a picture of Fu's sack race victory (he was like a regular mountain gazelle), and above Lucy lining up at the far end of the start line though I think she ended up on her face.

Wakefield Warriors vs. Sheffield Stampede (22/11/1998) 4/4

this is the last period in a game we won, though I'm buggered if I can make out who any of the players are!

Wakefield Warriors vs. Sheffield Sabres (22/11/1998) 6/6

The final period in a game agains the sabres

Derby Jets vs. Wakefield Warriors - Game 1 (8/11/98) 3/7

I think this selection starts with Wakefield 2-1 down and on the penalty kill after Paul has been sent off! Look out for me #16 and Paul #75. I think we won in the end.

Once a Warrior, always a Warrior...

As a follow up to my older (and balder) brother's nostalgic posts, I got that reminiscent feeling myself.

Recently on Facebook, a couple of guys that I used to play Skater Hockey with in a team called the Wakefield Warriors set up a page and got in contact. It turns out that Richard Shawright, our number one supporter had taken a number of videos of our early games! Aprehensively I loaded the video files up, anxious not to tarnish my memory of myself as being a "great" player with the actual truth! I was dissapointed to find that I was actually crap - but then again so was everyone else (we were only 15!).

I am far from being a team sports type myself, preferring the solitude of the gym or a run around town as my poison. However my times with the Warriors was some of the best of my life, the comradery was second to none. As all of the players for Sheffield teams were transferring around like glory grabbing mercenaries, the (less than fashionable) Warriors stuck with what they had. We managed top 5 finishes most years (out of 10 before you ask) and I think our Youth team (one with which Paul Wilson and I were very much involved) won the national championship the year that Paul and I were too old to play.

Indeed my greatest achievement was Junior "most improved player 2000", which I was proud of for around 20 minutes until my first line defense colleague Paul got "player of the year". I think the intimation was that I was rubbish to begin with.

One of my biggest regrets was not sticking with the uni team and carrying on playing. There are still nights when I imagine I am ghosting past players and scoring the winning goal, the stench of years of sweat dripping down from out of my helmet. Still, I was never a goal scorer and was only really good at knocking other people over - I hear the Junior league is non-contact now, I wouldnt have stood a chance.

Anyway a couple of videos are shown below, the quality (of both video and play) is crap, but this is one of our first games, before we played at the inline arena. Its a challenge to spot Paul (#75) or I (#16) either in the picture (which I think may be as old as 1996, age 14) or the videos (partially because Paul is usually sent off!), but we're in there somewhere! I am usually referred to as "Hugsy" or just "Hugs". You may hear our coach (the no-nonsense Dave Maize) shoulding various things such as "go-on Hugs, skate you lazy git" amongst other things

I wonder what they are all doing now...

The Bus from London to Sydney

Back in the Nineteenth Century when my Dad was young, he undertook a journey from the UK to sydney on a double decker bus. I was reading an Australia and New Zealand magasine recently and apparently there is a regular service ! I never knew my Dad was a trailblazer! I only wish he had the foresight to sell the concept back then (though I am not sure he had enough horses).

I wonder if we can get some of the images from his trip (which I have on VHS) up on here... hmmm will have to consult the lord of blogging on this one...

Trekking through the High Tatras (Poland - Part one)

Just got back from my Atkin expedition accross the high Tatras. I have to say it is one of the best trips I have ever taken! It had everything from danger, exertion and fatigue to pampering, posh hotels and relaxation.

We began our expedition with a two hour flight followed by two hour minibus journey to the town of Zakoplane in southern Poland. From here we had a two hour uphill slog to the first of our mountain huts (see right). Being the mountain hut virgin that I am (and gathering all of my information from Lucy's tall tales of previous Atkin holidays, I was expecting something resembling a lean-to shack crossed with a portaloo. What I got however was a stone build lodge type building with a large dining area and a 6 bed room - which led me to thinking "who the hell carried all of the stones up here?" Overly pleased with our first day of hiking we indulged in a beer or two (something which I would later regret (and then repeat).

The first full day of hiking perhaps brought with it the largest of the challenges. From our mountain hut on the Polish slopes of the Tatras, we had to make our way over the summit of the mountain (see left!) down into the next valley and the next hut. However what we didnt note on the map was a series of small circles olong the pathway, each one representing a particularly steep part of the mountain which has has "chains" attached to it for hauling yourself up narrow walkways and slippery rock faces each one almost equal in danger and difficulty as the "climbing frame of death"! Normally this wouldnt be so much of an issue, but the 12-15kg backpacks we were hauling made it one! After lugging ourselves up a number of the chains (and after our fair share of panics and tantrums) we stopped to take stock. And then the hailstones came down! Added to this Nick (Lucy's brother) dropped a sleeping bag down the slope (luckily landing on the path! Anyway despite the odds we pulled out our safety gear (luckily provided by eager climber Holly - Lucy's sister) and battled on. Tempers were frayed and a couple of members of the team had to be hauled up by their ailing bones but eventually we got to the top.

We were greeted by some spectacular views of the glacial tarns on both sides of the mountain which was our reward! The excitement of our success perhaps went to my head a little as I tried to persuade a few of the weary hikers to attempt the ridge trail (with a number of additional "small circles" on the map apparent). Having succeeded in persuading Lucy and Holly, we set off in persuit of our new trail. This was short lived however as the weather began to close in once more and we had to abandon our mission. According to Lucy this makes me equally as crazy as the Atkin clan, though I think I have a little more work to do to fully earn my badge.

The rest of the day was spend working our way through mist and fog to the second of our huts (almost as glamorous as the first bar the tens of homeless walkers camped in the corridoors and the cess pit like squat toilets). The next day unwashed and unshowered (we felt that not using the facilities may be more hygenic) we passed down into the next valley and accross into Slovakia which I will save for another blog....

....mainly because I dont have the pictures yet!

Comments from the Atkins welcome.